Random Ramblings: Death and Stuff.

[Sean]

If I were to die tomorrow, how would people remember me? I'm not attempting to me morbid or depressing...but I do often wonder. It doesn't particularly matter how I died, but just for effect, let's say I was eaten by a bear. The world, obviously, would remember me as one of the two people (on average) eaten or otherwise killed by bears each year in North America. How would my friends remember me though? Would they too remember me as “My friend who was eaten by a bear.” Part of me wishes they would...I mean, how often can you truthfully say that? It'd be pretty cool...I wouldn't necessarily mind that being attached to my memory in some way. Another part, however, hopes that they will remember me as the guy who made them laugh when they were feeling down...the guy who they'd turn to for a good back massage on a particularly stressful day...the guy who went to Walmart with them at 1 in the morning just because we could. Honestly, I also wouldn't mind if they remembered the bad. If I was the guy who was always a cock-block...the guy who never asked you out on a date, even when it was obvious I should have manned up and done it, please remember that. I'd hope that someone does. Why? Because that was (or is) who I am (or was). If my obituary says ,”Eaten by a bear”, that's okay. Most of the people reading it won't know me anyway, and they will probably forget me soon after reading that. The people who I will stick with, however, should have a full, complete memory of me. We as humans seem to have a habit of idealizing people after they pass on to wherever our existence goes to once that 40 watt power source in our skull runs out. I want to be remembered for 100% of what I have done, 100% of what I am. Not just fifty. Nor even seventy-five. All of it. And if those who knew me, who I touched in some way, shape or form can't do that, I'd rather they don't remember me at all. It may sound crude, but I realize I have faults. Everyone does. They shape us into who and what we are, so to simply disregard them after we stop breathing seems so wrong to me. I hope this isn't the case, but if when asked about me, someone said, “He was a funny guy, and had an amazing voice, but he was a total douche bag.”, I'd commend them. Whoever asked now knows the whole picture. Since I see no point in hiding anything about myself while I'm still kickin', why would I want to stage a giant cover up after I'm dead? I mean, I'M DEAD! What do I have to lose? The same Sean you know now should be the same Sean you know, or knew rather, once I've croaked. Yes...for a while, it is okay to allow the grandkids to believe that all their grandfather did was “Make farts that smelled like prunes.” Later though, please tell them the whole story.

What if the situation had changed...what if I hadn't died? How about I land a smashing movie deal tomorrow morning after my cup of tea? Will you, my friends, forever refer to me as “My friend Sean, the movie star!”? I certainly hope not. Do me a favor, and remind people that I'm a half decent guy with an okay singing voice. You can totally embellish any stories you tell about my Mr Universe-worthy body though.

[Lupine]

A good one, Sean. Thinking about the eaten by a bear scenario, it's almost like achieving a brief moment of celebrity status. It's rather sad that many of us can go through life, quietly, anonymously, only to be remembered by the public at large by our last moments.
I like to think though that we- if we've done our lives right- leave behind something more substantial than simply being remembered for a movie, or a heroic act, or becoming a chew toy for wildlife. That just by existing we can nudge events into being just a little better. Just to say something that makes someone else think, which might make them act or not to act, which will change events in a small way, then a large way. In the end with the vast expanses of history we will be forgotten no matter how famous. But perhaps the road we lay down with our lives and actions will be a good one.
Even if no one remembers who built it.

[RJDiogenes]

^^ Indeed. We touch a lot of lives during our years on Earth; the more positive our interactions, the more we positively effect the future. I'd like to think that all the things I've done to help people, or all the little kindnesses I've shown to people, strangers included, will add up to something someday.

I suppose that's the way I'd most like to be remembered (if I don't get to be remembered as The Guy Who Lived Forever). I've always tried to follow the examples of the heroes I read about in fiction and history, helping and being kind to people; that would be a good legacy (and, hopefully, another good example).

And I certainly wouldn't mind if all my stories and poems and artwork and stuff were remembered. Hopefully my niece and/or nephew will take good care of it all.

Nice essay, Sean. Very thoughtful and thought provoking. It's good to contemplate mortality from time to time, when not shaking one's fist at entropy.

And speaking of being eaten by a bear, has anyone else ever heard the recording of the guy and woman who were killed by a bear a couple of years ago? A tape recorder or video camera was left on and caught the whole thing. It was one of the most heartbreaking things I've ever heard in my life.