The Fat Acceptance thread

[Renie]

Thanks, blab! I wish it were a little more detailed and easy-to-navigate, but I've seen a LOT of hits from that thread in the past few days, so it looks like people are taking your advice.

Oh yeah, and do you know how much weight I've lost for my wedding so far?

ZERO LBS.

And I'm really proud of myself for not caving.

[RJDiogenes]

Some of those hits were from me. But don't worry, I'm not getting married.

[blablover5]

Oh no the grape is gonna go wedding dress shopping!

[RJDiogenes]

Always a bridesmaid....

[Cayla]

I can see the point, but some people haveto be careful about weight and health.

As long as I've known my mother-in-law, she has been over weight. She has had high blood pressure, high cholesterol, a borderline diabetic, and has always had back pain. Years ago she went to the doctor for her back and was highly upset when he told her to lose 60 pounds and her back wouldn't hurt anymore. She refused to exercise, and since her mid forties had a hard time walking. She always made others clean her house, and would spend her weekends on the couch watching tv. Earlier this year, when her doctor told her she was very close to being on insuline, she went to a nurtitionist. She went on a diet consisting of more fruits, more vegetables, and low fat. She agreed to use her treadmill every other evening, but would refuse to do more than a half mile on it. So far she has lost 60 pounds, her back no longer bothers her, she has more energy, does things she hasn't done in 20 years, her blood pressure and cholesterol is significantly down, and she no longer needs medication to control her diabetes. She walks three miles on her treadmill now, and does her own housework.

Now on the other hand, my best friend has struggled with her weight for years. She's also very short. No matter what she does diet or exercise wise, she stays the same weight. Her husband is diabetic and has high blood pressure, so they have been on a low sugar, low fat, low sodium diet for years. In her case, I see it as that is the way her body is meant to be. She's very active, has energy, and has been overall healthy.

Now onto the other extreme. I have a coworker that just got married. She brags that she is down to a size zero. She's always been a vegetarian (nothing wrong with that), but she changed her diet to be more "healthy". Her breakfast consists of two tablespoons of all natural peanut butter mixed with a spoon of honey and a spoon of cinnamon. Lunch is a yogurt, midday snack is a piece of fruit, and dinner is a salad or a vegetable. This is not good eating. She 's built like a ten-year-old, has no shape, and looks significantly older than what she is. She claims she feels the best she has in years, yet she suffers from migraines, has fibromyalgia, and can no longer exercise because her joints will hurt for days afterwards. Also, her new husband told her she looks great..."don't lose anymore, but don't gain anymore".

In my opinion, a lot of it has to do with our society. Look at celebrities, super models, and the clothes the stores are selling. Ever notice while watching tv shows and commercials that most everyone is thin? Women, ever notice that jeans, shorts, and pants are mostly all low waisted, and no matter what size they are, they are really made to look good on someone with a smaller frame?

I work in an office with four other women. One pukes up everything she eats, three starve themeselves, and one of them goes home everynight and exercises for two hours because she claims she has nothing else to do. At a size 6, I am considered the "fat" one. Two of them have brought in diets for me to go on (I never asked for them), and another has tried to push her "zero fat diet where the food tastes like shit " on me. This offends me and yet, at times it doesn't make me feel good about my self image.

[AstroSmurf]

^ Zero fat diet? The human body actually needs certain types of fat to function properly. And, from your pictures, you look fantastic so don't listen to those bags of bones. They are probably not thinking properly anyway because of a lack of food.

And I would like to back Cayla up on the health stance. I myself consciously maintain my weight due to health reasons. I am a diabetic and have found from experience that it is much easier to control when I am close to my ideal weight. I also gain weight easily because of it. Actually I gain weight easily anyway but the diabetes adds another level of difficulty to the problem. Right now I eat what and when I am supposed too. I exercise regularly. I stay away from processed foods, sugar and bad fats. I am also a vegetarian. But, at the same time, I have integrated this into my life such a way that it doesn't interfere with my day to day. I also splurge on occasion without beating myself up over it. I am also a vegetarian for moral reasons rather than diet.

I think one of the biggest problems with weight and dieting is how we have integrated it into our lives. For me it is a priority without being a priority. Rather than obsessing over it, I rarely get on the scales, count calories or make any effort other than follow the pattern I have set for myself. As for everyone else, I wish more people were educated about these things. Instead of following the magazine ads, movies, television or the narrow out-of-date advice of physicians, I think the population would benefit from better health information being made available to them. Instead of teaching people just about the food groups, maybe schools, doctors and government agencies could expand it to include how to better integrate healthy diet and exercise into our daily lives. The information should also be built in such a way that it is categorized by body mass (rather than weight), lifestyle and sex. And instead of dictating terms to the individual, the information could be designed as a tool or diagnostic to the individual rather than a general group. Most of the information available now about weight is not very useful because of the broadness of the information, use of weight rather than mass and it all reading like a VCR manual. Most folks have a very hard time comprehending and successfully using what is available now due to how it is presented. I know I did... and still do to a point.

[Sean]

^ I agree. When I was younger, maybe from the ages of 9-14, I was a rather large kid. Not morbidly obese, but I still had some mass on me. I don't think I've put on more than 10 pounds since then, and most of it is muscle. I've also grown more than 7 inches, so I've evened out. I may not be skinny now, and I am still probably heavier than most kids my age, but it seems to be how I was built to be.

Most of the men in my family have been rather large, both muscularly, and fat wise, so I guess I can't avoid it. I do, however, keep somewhat active, and try to eat a pretty healthy variety of foods, because heart problems and diabetes run on both sides of my family. I don't obsess about it though, and I let myself splurge every-so -often. And, because I am not in the best of shape, I may not get as many girls falling for me ( I can't stand people who find love for looks alone anyways), but I prefer to use personality and my sense of humor to find companionship anyways.

Even though I'm happy with myself, I get a bit uncomfortable whenever a doctor, or gym teacher talks about how I 'should be'. It seems as though they try to make you feel guilty, or fearful of what and who you are, and that pisses me off. I've never been really athletic, and I'm sure that if I had been from a very young age, I might be different, and in better shape. I just don't like it when I'm told to be someone I am not. Sadly, acceptance doesn't to seem to be hardwired into human nature...

[AstroSmurf]

^ Actually the "establishment" tends to do that with anything it doesn't perceive as normal so I would ignore them. I always did and still do. In High School most of the douche bag narrow minded facility referred to me as that "queer kid" or "the fag". I even had one tell me, to my face in classroom full of students, that I needed to find Jesus. Of course I politely told her that I had already found him with the bumper of my car and if she needed proof, his carcass was probably still lodged there. Yes it was overly crude (and I didn't really mean it) but it got my point across. Needless to say, those people hated me by the time I graduated. I stood up for myself, made my own rules and followed my own path, which they could never understand. This applies to everyone though.

We are all different. It is what makes the human race special and the worst thing we can do is try and beat the differences out of each other. And you may not realize this but having the opportunity to change one mind, opens the possibility of that mind changing others. So stand tall and relish in who and what you are. You will be surprised at what a difference it can make, not only for yourself, but for others. Clear a path, blaze a trail, rock the establishment or sew a seed. Every bit helps.

What did Galadriel say? “Even the smallest person can change the course of the future.”

[RJDiogenes]

I'm happy to say I've changed a few minds about various things over the years; and I hope to be able to bring up my niece and nephew to be good people, too.

It makes me sad to think of the things that many people have to deal with, especially when they're kids; it's too bad everybody doesn't have a place like this to come to.

[blablover5]

I am saddend at the number of young women (we're talking 20-25) who are having bariatric surgery and are more concerned about their wedding dress than what is about to happen to them.

They don't seem to realize how easily they could die. And I have no idea that one could get pregnant when most of your stomach is stapled.

Who the hell is selling this to young adults who aren't even done growing yet?

[RJDiogenes]

One of my midwives had her stomach stapled and then went through two pregnancies. She spent a great part of them in the hospital or home on bedrest.

[Cayla]

My husband has a cousin that had bariatric surgery in her mid twenties. In her case, I believe it did her good. She was at the point to where she could barely walk due to her weight. Now if one has the surgery at such a young age because they think they are over weight and want to be a size zero, then that's not right. The doctors who perform sugeries on those folks should have their licenses suspended.

I have a friend that had gastric bypass done five years ago. She lost one hundred pounds. Within the past year, she gained all of it back. I'm sure that can't be good for her stomach.

[DeaconBlues]

Okay, did I go to the link posted in at the top of this forum at the wrong time, or has it been removed/changed? I tried and was told that the blog had been removed. If there is some place it has been moved to I can read it from, please let me know because i am curious.

I am overweight based on BMI, and even at the hight of my competitive swimming career in high school, I could not get that well chiseled body. My dad was overweight as a kid, so he always pushed my sister and I to working out. For quite a while I felt bad about not being in perfect shape, and then after talking with Blab on this subject, I realized it was just sort of how I am. However, I would love to read more on it if I can be given a link.


On the idea of ideal health though, one more thought. The FDA doesn't really regulate dietary supplements aside from making sure that "These claims are not reviewed by the FDA" appears on the bottle, and that something that can be fatal is removed from the market when there is proof. Sure, the larger supplement makers are likely honest because they have a name to maintain, but a lot of smaller names are not going to necessarily be honest. Food for thought.

[RJDiogenes]

Hmm, I don't know. It seems to be gone. There's no link in Renie's sig here or at TrekBBS. She's a member of this group on Facebook, so that might be helpful. There might be something else on her Facebook page, too, but I am not good at navigating that place.

[blablover5]

Poor Grape, being easily confused by all those little facebook apps.

I'd say this is a good starting point:

http://junkfoodscience.blogspot.com/